April showers bring May flowers

Or just catch me unprepared wearing capris and little ballerina flats without an umbrella.

Toulouse had a sudden downpour this afternoon, and then the sun came out again. I'll wait a couple more weeks, but it's almost time to dry clean my wool winter coats and store them away.

I tutored my first students yesterday, and all went well (except getting lost in the small town the two families lived in). I still have to work on finding materials that are just the right level for teenagers, but I'm getting the knack of it. My previous experiences teaching have mostly been with little kids who never had English before or college students who new the basics and needed reenforcement. The recording I had the 15 year old girl listen to was way too long and too hard as a result, but now I now and I'll pick something better.

My supposed second teaching job has become one big question mark for me. I had a training date several weeks ago, but that was canceled. I was supposed to start working this week, but that was delayed. I talked with my contact today and I might work one day later on this month, and then the second half of May through the end of June. In theory, this job would be great for me because then I'd have experience working with adults. The pay is decent (if nothing to write home about) and at the end of the CDD I could do other things or maybe be called back to teach again.

I turned down a tutoring offer during April vacation because I thought I wouldn't have the time between the tutoring I'd already accepted and teaching adults. Since the start date with the client has been postponed though, I now have the time and could have accepted the hours! I've focused on job ads for teaching a few hours a week, or positions that start in June or July, but I'm beginning to wonder if I should act like the job's not going to come through. My dance teacher wanted older dancers to help out with the little girls class the hour before mine, which I would have done with pleasure, but I didn't volunteer myself because I thought I wouldn't be available.

I still haven't signed any contract or anything, and if I did get some positive response from somewhere else and they offered a contract right away, I'd sign and say 'Sorry' to the first company. I know I'm not tied to them.

I'm caught between feeling a bit used because they've strung me along by delaying everything and hoping to work and earn money and experience. I've turned down several things in order to be available for the company, but so far it seems like I gave up those things for nothing.

But I don't want to say 'screw it' completely and accept tutoring and volunteering and this and that on the days I said I could teach with them, only to find out I will actually start working and I'd need to re-arrange the other activities. I don't want to volunteer two weeks and then say "Actually, I need to earn money more than work for free, so I can't do this anymore." I don't want to accept a student to tutor only to announce three sessions later that they'll be working with a different teacher either. Plus the tutoring company wouldn't be too happy with me.

So that's my current conundrum. Hold out for the job? Or act like it's not going to come through.

Looking further into the future, I went and asked at the library and at the tourist office about their hiring process and now I know what to do now. I'll focus first on a summer job at the tourist office since it's a little more likely, but I think I have a decent profile to present for a job at the library. I also need to get my rear in gear with my Masters applications. Printing them out doesn't count as progress. I've got to go back to school so that my American degree will be validated in the eyes of the French.