A variation of this question is "Which country to do you prefer", and sometimes they're both asked.
So, to answer the question of which country I prefer, the truthful answer is France. I think that overall the social welfare programs (health, education), work-life balance ethic, food, and social life opportunities (museums, concerts, festivals etc) are better than what I could expect to have in the US. Of course there are aspects of American culture and the US that I prefer and that I miss, but they're not enough to make me actively plan to return to the US. Overall, the balance clearly tips towards France for me.
But life can bring surprises, and if my husband and I had a great opportunity that would mean moving to the US, I think we would do it without too much hesitation. That's one of the reasons we go married (the PACS isn't recognized by the US).
Being willing to move isn't the same thing as planning to move, however. It remains a possibility, but it's not something we are actively or passively pursuing.
But people don't really want to hear all that. Whenever I tell people I don't think we'll ever move back to the US they seem disappointed. I think they want to vicariously move to New York or San Francisco (never Arlington, VA or Champagne-Urbana, IL mind you) and hear exciting details about what you will do back in the States.
As for the country I prefer, they are obviously looking to hear France.
A couple weeks ago I was at a French-American club happy hour and a 20 year old French student started getting on my bad side by asking just about everyone single one of the the 'questions for foreigners'. When she asked which country I prefer, I sighed and said something like "A long story short: I like it in France and I don't plan moving anywhere else." She commented that my answer didn't seem very affirmative, was a bit negative, and then I started talking about how tired I got of always getting the same questions. She got defensive and said she was just trying to be polite. I didn't handle the whole thing well, I admit. I couldn't remember any of the techniques I had blogged about, and instead of getting creative I got crabby.
Chatting about it afterwards with my husband, he suggested that I should answer with a random country the next time someone asks me which country I prefer. Something like "Romania, it's really my favorite country". A silly answer for a silly question.
So here are a bunch of silly answers for the question "do you think you'll move back?":
-no, my parents converted my room into a walk-in closet
-only if you'll pay the moving costs
-well, it would make it really hard to see my GP
-I heard my ex has left the country, so I guess it's finally okay
-I signed the petition to pardon Edward Snowden, so I'm not sure the NSA will let me back in
-my California license expired, so I have to wait for the state to recognize French licenses because otherwise I couldn't drive
-my cat is afraid of flying, so it would be complicated
-ideally we would spend 6 months of the year in the US and 6 months in France
-it's risky because the fake marriage we have might be exposed
-actually my extended family is looking to move to France
-we bought an oculus rift so I could virtually move back to the States
2 comments:
The fourth one made me laugh.
When people already know what answer they want to hear and you're just honest, it can throw them off. That happens to me too because I usually say what I'm actually thinking and feeling, which is of course not always neatly candy-coated.
If you don't feel like elaborating on your responses, you could turn the question on them: "Do you ever think about moving from where you currently live?" That's what I do, anyway.
Champaign Urbana REPRESENT!!! It's a nice place to live if you don't mind being boring :)
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