Yesterday was the annual assembly (AG) of the French American club I am a member of in Toulouse, and for one of the first times (I've been a member for about 5 years but only attended 3 AGs) there was significant debate about the future of the club.
The big issue is that of the ~50 members, there are only 5 American citizens. And there are probably only 5 members under 40 as well (although that wasn't really discussed).
The members around the table (almost all French, almost all retired) asked "Why aren't there more Americans? Why aren't there more young people?"
For me the answer is simple: "Because of you."
If you're a 25 year old American in Toulouse as an English assistant or studying or freshly hired by Airbus and you go to a Happy Hour where you only see French senior citizens, it's normal you run for the hills.
A number of the French members are part of the club because their adult children live in the US. There's also a retired English teacher who vacationed in the US once or twice. And a number of people for whom I really don't know their link to the US. Among the members who's children live in the US, I don't think any of them know more than a few words of English and they have not spent significant time (or any?) in the US visiting their children. Taking away the fact their children live in the US, I don't think we have anything in common.
Many of the French members of the club joined to practice their English, to celebrate the historical links between the US and France (think Lafayette), or to engage in "American" activities like line dancing, Route 66 nostalgia, and vintage coke ad culture (This kind of stuff). And while Americans do speak English, there are long diplomatic ties between the countries, and some Americans do line dancing, those are not the first things I think of when I think of my country. The older members are really disconnected from current American culture, as well as what interests the average American in France looking for a social network.
Last night people made suggestions of events or activities to increase participation: visiting historical locations, going to museums in Toulouse, celebrating the Chandeleur, etc. But no one mentioned Groundhog day (do they even know it?). Some of the members asked me why young people don't seem interested in attending events, and it was a bit shocking how clueless they were: it's normal that the under 30 crowd is not clamoring to help put flowers on a statue for Americans killed in France during WWI nor going to a movie night with some 50-70 year olds.
The nature of Americans living in France has changed as well. When I did my junior year abroad 10 years ago, it was common to spend the entire year in one country. Now that's the exception rather than the rule, and it means students are only staying in Toulouse 3-4 months. The Assistant teaching contracts are only 7 months, instead of 9. How can you except someone to get involved in the community and a member of the club if they're only here for 4 months? By the time they hear about it they're already leaving.
There are Americans who come to Toulouse for longer periods, either for work or to study, but with so many ways to stay connected with friends and family in the US or to meet other Americans the French American club just can't compete.
I'm not giving up on the club: I'm in it for the long-haul, if you consider "it" life in France, and I've met some really great people through the club. But it's frustrating to be witness to this generational schism. I also am trying to balance my involvement with the club with all the other activities I have (dance, community band, alumni association, work, husband...). I think the club will limp through this period and gradually gain new members that are younger and more often American, but I'm not sure what the place is for the long-term members who are so disconnected with the US.
5 comments:
Ha, I looked up some similar clubs in Brussels lately and the British club had some photos up that were literally all women in their 70s or so. And then the icing on the cake was that every activity they offered was on a weekday afternoon, so of course they're not attracting a younger membership. I think it's great that you're hanging in there. Could you do a language café-type thing? I think opportunities to improve their French/English would be one thing that would bring in the young 'uns. I used to very occasionally go to one in a bar in Tours and it was always lively and a mix of all kinds of people.
I ran into a similar thing before I moved to France - I was really involved in the Finnish-American community, and my last year of college, I was invited to sit on the board for the annual national Finnish festival (to be held that summer on my college's campus).
The board was mainly made up of first & second generation Finnish Americans who were 50+, and they invited me to participate in order to bring in some of the younger crowd in order to keep it going in the future. But they knocked all of my ideas (Finnish film festival, Finnish concert, reduced entry for students, etc) and refused to give me much of a budget to work with. Plus they didn't want to do any kind of online publicity.
They just stuck with the typical things - polka bands, genealogy lectures, etc, and as a result, we had a good turnout out in the 60+ crowd but almost no one under 30, and they couldn't understand why. It was a pretty frustrating experience for me overall.
Yes, but if you think about it, it's easier to make friends when you are under 30. Why would you go to a club when you have friends from university to hang out with? And people between 30 and 45 are busy building careers, buying houses and having children. There are not many people who feel like going out or can after working/commuting for 10 hours and then getting dinner on the table and the children to bed.
This is almost exactly the case with Lorraine-Etats Unis, and I really wanted to help mix things up, but . . . bébé kind of changes things! I used to really enjoy the conversation circle Monday evenings (made up entirely of retired ladies), but at 5:30, it's an awkward time if you're working/have kids. I can usually get to the weekend or holiday activities, but I don't feel as connected as I did when I saw them weekly.
I also got the feeling that I was never invited to do more because they see me as "temporary" (even after 7 years). Or maybe because I'm young and don't have any useful contacts.
It's the same here in Lille. And it's sad because I would really love to find people more like me and less like them :(
Post a Comment